11 months old

Griffin is now 11 months old. I just can't believe how fast it's going. In just a few short weeks our little guy will be turning 1!! It's insane. He just started sleeping through the night again after being sick, which we are very happy about. He is so funny and sweet and such a snuggle bug. He loves to give hugs and kisses and blow raspberries on us. Being his mom is just the best.

confessions of an accidental co-sleeper

the first night we brought griffin home from the hospital he was 27 days old, and i was terrified. it was the first time he wasn't hooked up to monitors that beeped if something happened to him; monitors that i could look at and see his heart rate, pulse ox, and make sure he was okay... monitors that told me he was still alive. he slept in our bed that night, curled up in between scott and me. i woke up every 5 minutes to hear him breathe. i felt crazy, but i knew i didn't want to be a co-sleeping mom. i nannied for those moms. those moms who hadn't spent the night alone with their husband for 10+ months. those moms whose 2 year olds are still in bed with them. those moms who sleep on the floor with their kids, while their husbands sleep in the bed. i did not want to be that mom. so on night number two griffin slept in a bassinet, next to the bed. that only lasted about a week or so. and then we put him in his crib (in his own room). at this point he was waking up once, maybe twice a night. by 3 months he was weened off any and all nighttime feedings and was sleeping from 7pm-7am. it was amazing. and then he hit 5 months old. something changed, and he just started waking up. and instead of just letting him cry we spent every night trying to figure out why he was crying (teething?, hungry?, poopy?, etc). we should have just let him cry, but instead we got up with him, fed him bottles, and changed diapers. by 6 and a half months we were just completely exhausted from getting up every.single.night (and for some reason i literally couldn't handle hearing him cry it out in the middle of the night) and one night we brought him into bed with us. it was 2am and we just wanted to sleep. and he slept until 7am. it was so nice. from then on he came into our bed maybe once or twice a week for a little while, and every once in awhile he'd sleep through the night. and then it stopped. he started waking up every night just to come into bed with us. it got earlier and earlier too. at first he woke up between 2am-4am, and then it was 11pm, and then it was 9pm, and then he wouldn't even fall asleep in his own crib. it was heinous. there have been many a night where i've laid next to griffin in my bed at 7pm trying to get him to fall asleep. i hated it. and after more than two months of that i finally hit my breaking point. i'd become a co-sleeper. i'd become that mom that i never wanted to be. it was deeply affecting my relationship, and affecting my feelings for griffin. sometimes it's nice to snuggle with your baby, but not when they're crawling all over you at 3am. i'm happy to say that one week shy of his 10 month birthday, our little boy is sleeping in his crib again. through the night. he's teething now, so sometimes he wakes up, but i let him cry. it's been about a week since we started letting him cry it out, and it's changed my life. i get to cuddle next to scott at night. i get to stretch out in my bed, and i get to greet my son each morning feeling refreshed instead of worn out. i love it. i'm happy i'm no longer a co-sleeper.

carving pumpkins

trying to lose

my son is 9 months old and i've lost 25 pounds. which is great. except that i gained 35 pounds total during my pregnancy and had about 20 pounds i wanted to lose before that. so that equals 30 more pounds that i'm trying to lose. before the wedding. before i have another baby. 30 pounds. i belong to a gym that does a biannual bootcamp. it's a 7 week program, and i really want to document it, and my progress, on here. saturday started day 1 of the program, and i was up at 5:30am for my 6am class. we weighed in, took our bmi percentages, ran a timed mile and then went through our first "circuit". it was great, and reminded me a lot of crossfit, which i realize i really, really miss. it's pretty intense. we work out 8 times a week with 1 day of rest, so twice a week we're working out 2 times a day. here is our weekly workout schedule (starting with sunday):
sunday:  60 min cardio, 20 min strength- upper/core
monday: 30 min cardio, 20 min strength- upper/core
tuesday: am: 30 min cardio, 20 min strength- lower/core, pm: 30 min cardio/strength
wednesday: rest
thursday: am: 30 min cardio 20 min strength- lower/core, pm: 30 min cardio/strength
friday: 30 min cardio, 20 min strength- lower/core
saturday: group workout: cardio and circuit.

you need to do 20 minutes of strength work a day, alternating between upper and lower, or you can do 1 hour of strength work twice a week with a full body workout (like crossfit or an hour long circuit workout). so i might go to crossfit twice a week and then go my cardio and other such stuff at the gym.

in addition to this we have to eat a pretty strict, almost paleo, diet. which is pretty easy for me. it's just the no alcohol thing that is hard for me. sometimes i just want a glass of sauvignon blanc! we are allowed one cheat day during the entire 7 weeks (which goes from 10/29 to 12/10). and i've chosen thanksgiving as my cheat day. i definitely can't give proper thanks without cheesy appetizers, lots of mashed potatoes, and glasses of wine

thoughts on life

i'm trying to figure out what to do with myself. besides being a stay at home mom, that is. i love blogging, but i want to be better at it, and i feel like i'm not interesting enough or don't have enough to share. my lovely sister, brie, is thinking of quitting her job and taking some indesign or photoshop courses. i want to take a photography class, and i think together we could be a great team. bloggers, designers, photographers. i think it's a genius idea, and would totally appeal to my creative side which desperately needs an outlet.
thoughts?

happy 9 months, baby

this kid is 9 months old. still a tiny peanut at 16lbs, he is the love of our lives. he's standing, trying to walk, babbles all the time, and loves to read. i can't believe he'll be 1 year old in a few short months. we just love him so much. it's insane how big he's getting.

the little dude

hanging out with the little dude has been so much fun lately. he's getting so fun and loves to play. i'm so lucky i get to spend every day with him.

8 months old

can you believe this kid is 8 months old? he is such a joy. he is so happy and smiley. he has three emotions: crying (angry or frustrated), happy, and serious. he's hilarious. he loves to give kisses and cuddles. he's absolutely obsessed with me and has recently become such a daddy's boy on scott's days off. it's too cute. it's like he knows that he only has so much time to get daddy snuggles in, and so on scott's day off all griffin wants to do is hang out with his dad. it's just the best to see them together. griffin has changed our lives completely and we are so in love with him. absolutely, completely enamored by this little guy and that adorable smile. happy 8 months, griffin. we sure are lucky to have you around.

tumblr

i've been neglecting my blog because i finally decided to get a tumblr. it's easier, faster, but i can't tell if i like it more or not. anyway, i'm sorry for neglecting you blog and i hope to write more often and keep this blog going. blogger is such a different community than tumblr, and i think i like blogger more. we'll see... i'll give tumblr some time.

wedding update

from bhldn

these are the shoes. yes? yes!

today

one year ago today i got a phone call from a genetic counselor. she was calling to discuss the results of my AFP test and to schedule an in-depth ultrasound with a perinatologist to find out what was wrong with the fetus. this phone call changed our lives. it's just so incredible to think about how much has happened in our lives in the last year.

7 months old

today someone is 7 months old. i can't believe it! it feels like he just came home from the hospital and now, here we are, watching him play in his exersaucer and feeding him solid food. 7 month old griffin is tiny and we love it. he eats all the time and loves everything we give him. he's actually a pretty good and mellow baby, minus the screaming himself to sleep and waking up in the middle of the night. he says "dada" all the time, and loves to say "baba" and only says "mama" when he's screaming. he is learning to wave and is starting to say "hi". it's the cutest. he still doesn't sit up on his own, or crawl yet, but it'll come soon enough. we sure do love this little guy (but i'd love him a little more if he slept through the night)

sister days

sometimes brianna and i get to hang out all day. and it's really, really fun. she's my twin sister, but she's also my best friend. i love hanging out with her. she's not as helpful as i thought she'd be with griffin (not like my wonderful friend, lauren, who will come over and watch him and offers to help me organize rooms in my house. i love her!), but she's still my sister and she loves her nephew. she just wants to look at him, versus holding him/changing him/feeding him. but brianna and i have a lot of fun together and it is lovely to hang out with her.

the other day we got to drive out to sonoma and enjoy the Fremont Diner. seriously, this place is amazing. it looks like a run down gas station, but it has the most delicious food. after that brianna and i dropped griffin off at my mom's house and we went to the giant's game! thanks, future hubby, for watching griffin after work and giving us your tickets! :)

griffin getting mommy snuggles

reading the menu. this is right before he shoved it in his mouth

there it goes, right in the mouth...

griffles & aunty brie

wonderful farmer's toast

best. burger. ever

griffin trying to drink some olympia. true hipster right there.

the giants vs padres. they won in the 14th inning. go giants!

veronica becomes a mrs. and griffin starts to eat

the weekend of july 9th my wonderful friend veronica got married!! i was a bridesmaid, and it was a very fun day. my dad even watched griffin over night so scott & i wouldn't have to worry about bringing a baby to a wedding.

veronica holding griffin at brunch the day after the wedding

scott had a very good night.

the wedding was very fun, and i'm happy for veronica but i think i'm done with being in weddings (except for being the bride, of course). it's just a lot of work and money and i missed my little boy. it would've been a bit more fun just being a guest and getting to sit next to my fiance at dinner. also, i totally lost it and really started missing griffin before the night was over. i was convinced he wasn't sleeping for my dad and missed us. haha. ridiculousness

in other griffin news, he's eating solids!!

we started with avocado, and i'm so glad we did!

it's been so easy to take him to a restaurant, order a side of avocado and a demitasse spoon and feed the griff monster. but the other day at whole foods we discovered the best invention ever:

these packs are squeezable, griffin LOVES them, and they have zero clean up. i'm still making 90% of his food, but these are very handy. so far we've tried apples & bananas. success!!

lately

lately i've been a bad blogger, and a bad housewife. i never get anything done, i'm hardly on the computer so blogging definitely hasn't happened, and i'm just enjoying Griffin. it's been great to watch him get bigger. a lot has happened over the past few weeks that i wanted to share with the blogosphere.

for the 4th of july (seriously, it's been that long since i blogged), scott, griffin, and i went up to lake county and spent some time with our friends, the sheltons. we swam, barbecued, and watch fireworks. it was a lot of fun, and griffin loved swimming. it was so cute seeing him in the pool for the first time.

griffin borrowed sam's swim trunks, since mommy's forgot to pack his. aren't they cute?

griffin just hanging out at the pool. it was a ridiculous 100 degrees in lake county.

so sleepy after swimming

scott wearing griffin's hat. ridiculous.

it was so nice to be around people with kids. we hung out with mary & zach, their two kids, mary's brother and sister in law, and their two kids. it was great! i loved every minute of it (except when 3am showed up and griffin decided not to sleep).

griffin's weekend according to my iphone

griffin tries to grab everything we drink

we went to a jazz concert at rodney strong vineyards

and griffin wore protective ear muffs when the music started

griffin played with daddy at the concert

and then he fell asleep

scott's parents came into town to hang out and visit, and we painted the living room! i'll post about that soon.

5 months old

5 month old griffin chews on everything, finally loves his sophie the giraffe (see him making out with her in that picture?), and can almost sit on his own. he is a very mellow baby, takes several 1 hour naps a day (really, griff, you can't take a 2 hour nap? what the heck?!), sleeps 12 hours through.the.night, and still wears 0-3 month clothes. he's our peanut and we are so in love with him. i can't believe he's 5 months old already. it is going by too fast.

happy father's day

to the best dad in the world. this photo was taken when little griffin was just 3 days old, and it was our first time getting to hold him. we found out about griffles one year ago today, and he has been the most amazing gift. happy father's day, scott (one day late). we love you.

a conversation

brittany "i know you said you wanted a machete for father's day, but can i just get you popsicle molds?"

scott "that was the weirdest question ever".

side notes:

1. i was thinking of these popsicle molds and scott always talks about how he wants to make popsicles with griffin when he gets older.

2. scott really does want a machete so he can hack away all the bushes and flowers in our yard i hate

3. what scott really, really wants is a weed eater

(trying to) raise a paleo baby

(t-shirt design via balanced bites)

i eat a paleo diet.

i hate using the word "diet" because it makes it sound like it's something that i'll stop doing eventually. but i'm not going to do that. it's a lifestyle change. and paleo works for me.

when i was breast feeding griffin he was also a paleo baby. but now he's not. he's formula fed because he wasn't gaining any weight, and because of our medical history the doctors weren't okay with waiting to see if he'd eventually gain. which i understand.

i would be lying if i said that formula feeding griffin isn't easier, but that doesn't change the fact that i'm disappointed that i'm not breast feeding (all the hours i logged pumping for that baby while he was in the hospital!!) and feel totally guilty at times (like it's my fault).

a few people have talked to me about using raw goat's milk for griffin. it's been used for decades as a replacement to breast milk, and is better on the digestive system than cow's milk (raw goat's milk can digest in a baby's tummy in 20 mins - like breast milk- whereas it takes 8 hours to fully digest cow's milk). there are a few issues i have with using raw goat's milk, but this is my biggest one:

it's raw, which is great, but it can carry bacteria. and if griffin gets any bacterial infection it can attack his bowels and we could lose him. i'm not going to risk that. he's too fragile.

it took awhile to find a formula that worked for griffin and mimicked my breast milk enough for him to digest it well and gain weight (extra calorie formula). he's gaining weight on it, he's healthy, and he's doing well. he will only be on it until he is 1 year old, and then it's off the formula and we get to have milk. and then i might introduce raw goat's milk, if my doctor and surgeon say it's okay to try.

all of that being said, he is 4 1/2 months old now, and at 6 months he gets to start eating real food! our pediatrician said i could start giving him rice cereal if i wanted, though if he "got constipated, which can happen with rice cereal, you can give him oatmeal or barley". umm, no thanks. we're not doing the rice cereal thing. his first foods will be acorn squash, butternut squash, green peas, sweet potatoes, pears, apples, and bananas. yes, i'm making all of his food, and i am so excited for him to eat! i can't wait!! he'll also visit the surgeon about 2 weeks after he starts eating solids so they can monitor how he's doing with solids.

just because he's not paleo now, doesn't mean he won't be.