little tiny baby clothes

gymboree has clothes for "up to 7lbs" (which is preemie sized), then they go from 0-3 months (which is 7+ pounds), etc. i was at the mall today and stopped by and got a few of the dinosaur onesies, but everything there was so cute! i was so happy to find some teeny, tiny clothes for our little guy.

i love this little tiny dinosaur hat. they also have it in elephant pattern. so cute.

cute little elephant bodysuit. they have adorable little elephant pants, too. and onesies. love.

adorable little baby sweats in size "up to 7 pounds"

i'm so happy i found this store today. it was nice to buy little things that jackson will be able to wear early on (when we bring him home).

baby boy

on friday scott & i went to our 24 week ultrasound (even though i was 23 weeks 5 days). it was in santa rosa, and it was a normal fetal ultrasound. that was weird for us. it wasn't an hour long... we didn't need to meet with doctors afterwards... it was just the tech, it took about 10 minutes, and then we were done. crazy. it's strange how much has changed in the last few weeks since the gastroschisis diagnosis. it's weird how a normal ultrasound is weird for me. it's weird that i have a high risk pregnancy. it's weird that instead of talking to other moms about the nursery or fussing over small stuff i spend my days talking to other moms about how long their babies were in the hospital, when they got to hold them for the first time, when the baby pooped for the first time, how many surgeries he/she had to have. today we talked about whether or not to have pacifiers in the NICU for the baby (it helps gastroschisis babies immensely to further develop their suckling when they are finally able to be bottle fed), and if i'll be able to breast feed. i want to breast feed, and there's a good possibility i won't be able to because we need to regulate how much food the baby is taking in at each feeding. we might even have to supplement the breast milk i pump with formula to make sure the baby is getting enough calories to gain weight.

it's just that this whole pregnancy isn't "normal", so to have a normal ultrasound appointment was so weird. i felt like something was wrong. like they weren't doing their job well enough. i can't explain it, really. my dad came to the appointment, and that was really nice. i think it brought him some comfort that he needed. the ultrasound tech said something about how it looks like there's not very much bowel on the outside. my dad got excited about that. but i know what we're facing, and i know that i can't listen to the tech's diagnosis of the baby's gastroschisis. i am 100% aware that you cannot tell the state of the bowels (except for bowel death, distention, and if the bowel has looped at all) before birth. so as nice as it was for her to say that, and i'm sure it was nice for my dad to hear it, i can't buy into that. because we just don't know what we're dealing with yet.

holidays

it is finally feeling like fall here. i've been waiting for this weather. i love it. it's making me want the holidays to approach quicker. and now that i have an adorable house to decorate i can't help but look at different ideas.

this wreath is adorable, and from etsy.

i love the vintage feel of these knit stockings from pottery barn

i'm absolutely obsessed with this mantle from pottery barn. the paperwhites are incredible. we have an amazing, long mantle and i can't wait to decorate it for every season/holiday.

i'm so excited for the holidays. i'm excited for scott's family to come out for thanksgiving, and to finally entertain a little bit in our new home, and i'm so excited for christmas. probably because the baby is going to come just a few weeks after christmas. it'll be our last christmas without a baby, and our first christmas together.

just fun.

i just love these knit plushes, courtesy of sandra juto

baby update

i've already posted this photo, but i can't help myself... he's just so cute! plus, we don't have a lot of pictures of the baby so i don't have any new ones to post. anyway, that's not what this is about. yesterday i got a phone call from reena, our genetic counselor, to talk about the UCSF appointment and schedule another ultrasound (yes, another ultrasound). Kaiser SF hadn't received the paperwork from the UCSF appointment, but reena knew that they'd want me to be seen for ultrasounds at 24 weeks, 28 weeks, 32 weeks, and finally around 36 weeks. next week marks week 23... so the 24 week ultrasound is coming up quick. anyway, it was scheduled for next wednesday, and then we were to meet with perinatology and the scheduling nurse in that office to schedule the rest of our appointments.

well, today reena called again to say that she spoke to dr. wu (our perinatologist at Kaiser SF) who had a chance to look over our scans from UCSF. he said that since everything looks as expected and that it looks as though we're dealing with a basic case of gastroschisis we can continue our 24 week and 28 week ultrasounds at Kaiser Santa Rosa. i was very happy. it's definitely not the first time they've let someone continue being treated at their home base hospital, but it's nice to know that they don't think much else (besides the obvious) is wrong.

reena also told us that we'd be doing our 32 week ultrasound at Kaiser SF and at that appointment we'd tour the NICU, meet with perinatology, possibly do the amnio they want to do before the delivery date (or we'll wait til 36 weeks... but they might choose to do the amnio at 32 weeks just to see where the lungs are at), and also come up with the birth plan.

in other baby news, scott & i just signed up for our birthing class. it starts november 22nd at 6:30pm and runs every monday for 5 weeks. we will finish the class monday, december 27th, with just a few weeks to go until the birth. we're excited for the birthing class (and i'm a little nervous, too).

YES.

these jeans

this shirt

and these boots...

wardrobe for next year's christmas card! too cute.

oh, and if anyone doesn't want to get me anything off the registry, then looking at the stuff i post on the blog is a good option! i love all this stuff.

pumpkin picking

yesterday, scott & i went pumpkin & apple picking in sebastopol, then headed to graton for lunch. it was so much fun. the weather was perfect, and it's finally starting to feel like fall here.

wanted to compare my baby bump with the pumpkins...

look at all these shapes! it was amazing.

scott definitely took picking pumpkins out very seriously... he was all over the place looking for the perfect carving pumpkin. we also got fun shaped gourds just to put out on the porch.

i loved this place... the pumpkins were amazing.

after pumpkin picking we tasted a bunch of apples and then decided on 10lbs of jonathan apples for $10. it was a great deal... and now i have to figure out what to do with 10lbs of apples.

our baby

we went to UCSF yesterday for our first appointment since the gastroschisis diagnosis. the ultrasound was an hour long (as was expected) and he was moving around like crazy! he's getting bigger now and i can feel him move and kick more frequently, but he's still too small to kick with enough force for anyone else to feel. it was weird to see him kick and feel it at the same time. our ultrasound tech was amazing. i loved her. she kept talking about how cute his little face is - and we agree. the pictures don't do him justice, but he's very cute. and we got to see him yawn - it was so sweet. and then he fell asleep, which was adorable. i could just stare at him in there all day (except for the fact that the ultrasound starts to get uncomfortable).

they were able to show us his bowels and i knew before she told us what they were. that was the only part that was a little sad for me, i just want him to be absolutely perfect and to see the evidence that he isn't perfect was just sad. they did check the bowels and said that there is blood flow all through the bowels which is a very good sign (no bowel death). besides that we didn't get any information that we didn't expect to get in terms of the baby and how he's progressing. the ultrasound doctor said that everything looked "as expected". and i learned that no news is good news with gastroschisis.

after our ultrasound (and a picnic in the car) we had an appointment with a pediatric surgeon (Dr. Hirose) and a perinatologist and they talked to us about the baby's surgery and the delivery. i'll deliver (and have the rest of my ultrasound appointments) at Kaiser San Francisco and the fetal surgery team from UCSF (Dr. Hirose and his team) will be there to get the intestines back inside. they want to shoot for delivery at 36 weeks, but before they decide to induce me they'll do an amniocentesis to see if his lungs are developed. i was born at 34 weeks and didn't have lung problems, so i don't imagine our little guy to have any at 36 weeks, but we'll see how that goes. they told me that i'd go to Kaiser SF every 4 weeks for ultrasounds before delivery. so i'll go down for another ultrasound at around 24 weeks (which is only 3 weeks from now, but they want me to do it then because it's the last week i can decide if i want to terminate), then 28, 32, and finally 36. they said that if they start asking me to come for ultrasounds more frequently then there's some concern about the baby. it's weird that i only have like 15 weeks left. it's weird to be able to count down (or essentially be able to count down). they want me to deliver vaginally, which i was concerned about, but they assured me that there is no problem for a gastroschisis baby to be delivered vaginally, and they want me to do it vaginally because it's better for the baby. so, even though i'm a little scared i want to do anything that they say is better for the baby.

nursery rugs

i have been looking for a rug for the baby's room for awhile. i really want a soft sheepskin style rug, or an amazing shag rug (in white or an off-white color). something that the baby and i could sit on while i read to him. something that just looks cozy. i think i've finally found it. west elm has a great sheepskin rug.

i love it. it's perfect for the baby's room. there's also a great shag rug at crate & barrel that is so soft and fun. but i think the west elm rug is my favorite.

baby animal print

i love these baby animal prints. i think they'd look adorable in the baby's room. scott likes the giraffe, but i love the lamb one (though the giraffe is very cute).